Its true when they say that in the end you only have yourself.
I dunno if I'm about to start my period or if i'm really truly sad. Cause I do feel extremely, well more lost than anything. And I feel like there's no one here to guide me, except for God and myself. And maybe that's all that I have in the end. Granted, I do have a tremendous family and great friends. I feel like I'm missing something when there's everything right in front of me that's there to create a good life. And I always try to make the best out of things, I always look on the brighter side of life cause there's always someone else out there that has it way worst then me. And I always try to turn things into a positive. But it dosen't always work out that way. And this, is one of those times and its hard for me handle.
What I have on my plate right now is so hard for me to handle. School is bustin my ass, but its what i need in order to have a good life for myself, a stepping stoen to my independence. My father just passed and I'm the one who's taking care of my mother, I'm the one not going to the college of my choice, I'm the one making sacrifices in my life in order to keep my mom's mind off of the great loss that she's just had. I feel like my boyfriend is giving up on me, like I'm just going to get over it and that's it. Like he dosen't feel like putting up with me or giving me advice cause he's always gonna have me. And it's not like I'm planning on going out to look for other guys, but I'm not tryin to stay in a place where there's a minimum amount of effort there to keep me. But it's whatevers. I guess I'm just in a place right now that I've never been before and I don't know how to handle it really.
But for you Daddy, I'm going to try my best to stay strong and make you oh so proud.
It's a lot shorter than what i wanted...but it's ok.
